I'm Leaving The Church

 

Today I am sharing something with you that is very personal, makes me feel vulnerable and saddens me as well.

Hello friends and family.

I know the post title says, "I'm Leaving The Church" but maybe it would be better if it read, "The Church Has Left Me"....This may be a long post so if you're interested grab your favorite beverage and settle in..

As most of you know and for those who don't I am Catholic. The Catholic Church has been in my veins all my life but sometimes even the things, places and people we believe should be there are something we need to move on from and this is where I am. 

I have written about my struggles with the Catholic Church for quite some time now so this is not new for me. I have struggled, and wrestled and prayed and prayed and prayed some more for guidance and I believe the Lord has finally answered me. 

I am leaving the Catholic Church but I am not leaving Him. Why am I leaving? There are many reasons but I will list a few here. If you would like to know more you can always drop me an email. 

Let me first begin by saying, in the Catholic Church there is much wisdom and beauty, there are some very good, good priests, many, many wonderful Saints and a handful of bishops and cardinals. I will also say that this decision hurts me very much but sometimes in life we have to do things or go through things that hurt us to get to the other side. 

Over the course of the last two years a lot of things have come out that have been dirty little secrets or dirty HUGE secrets. Things that have been going on for decades sometimes centuries. Yes, you have corruption in any organization. There is pedophilia, money laundering, homosexual grooming, lying, cover ups, bribes, stealing, trafficking in all walks of life and no one organization or institution is immune too it because these institutions and organization are run by fallen, sinful humans.

The problem for me that I can not get past though is all of these things and more have happened in my Church. The One place I look to for refuge, guidance, safety, peace, beauty, Tradition and because of the acts of a lot of sinful, degenerate men and some women down through the decades they have stripped the Church of her beauty. They have raped a Bride of Christ. They have installed a man in the chair of Peter who is nothing more than a socialist, globalist who seems to care more about the environment, and the one world order than our Lord Jesus Christ and saving souls. 

So where am I going. I am going to the Orthodox Church. For those who do not know, the Orthodox Church and the Catholic Church used to be one Church together until the year 1054 that is. Rome decided it was going to make changes, the East, The Orthodox said no, they both got angry at each and and literally ex-communicated each other which is why now you have the Eastern Orthodox and the Western Roman Catholic Church. 

I have been learning over the last few months all about the Orthodox. Reading, studying, watching videos from Orthodox Monks and Priests. I've been praying and asking the Lord if this is the answer and I do believe yesterday He finally gave me that answer. 

I will leave you with this final thought. If you were to tell a Catholic, a traditional Catholic that is, or a Catholic Priest that you are leaving the Roman Catholic Church and going to the Eastern Orthodox the replies you'll receive will be ( and I've had them said to me), How can you leave ? You have to stay and fight for Mother Church. You will go to hell if you leave, there is no salvation outside the Church. The Catholic Church is the One True Church.

I used to believe these things. Not anymore. As for going to hell. I believe and have been taught, God does not send us to hell, we send ourselves there by our sinfulness, unwillingness to repent and serve. As for the One True Church. Even today, Rome recognizes the Sacraments of the Eastern Orthodox as valid which speaks VOLUMES in itself. If Rome recognizes the Sacraments as valid then it begs the question, who has the One True Church? There can not be two..

I believe the One True Church is the Eastern Orthodox. They have never changed their beliefs. They have never changed their liturgy. They have never changed their tenant of faith. It's been the same for 2021 years. They have never changed anything to try and 'look more attractive to the world to fill the pews or the coffers". They are smarter than that. They are not a business or an institution. They do not own properties worth billions of dollars. They are not in the 'business of the world".. The only business they are in , is the business of loving, supporting, teaching, caring, and saving souls for Christ. They are community, they are family. THIS is the One True Church that Christ spoke about, that He began.

Rome has gone so far off the rails She is unrecognizable and those who are corrupting and destroying her are dragging many, many souls straight to hell with them. You have no idea how much that hurts me to say that. I truly can not express to you in words how much that hurts me but truth at times, does hurt.

So that's it...

I will share with you in another post very soon why I believe that the Lord gave me my answer as clearly as possible. I hope you will join me on my path....

I'm Going Back

 

Hello Friends and Family ! 

Good gosh! Two posts in one week. We gotta stop meeting like this.... So, are any of you as old as me that you remember the Coke and Pepsi wars?

These days it's the Apple and Android Wars. Both for cell phones and tablets. I do have a Samsung android Tablet which I love, would have liked an iPad but finances being what they were at the time, the Samsung was cheaper and does all I need it to do.. As for cell phones? Now that's a whole other animal.

I used to be a Samsung android girl. Not for any other reason in particular in that most of the time I never got involved in electronics, that was hubby's department and if he said it was good, I said okay.

Well, last year I decided to switch to an iPhone and to my surprise I liked it. I actually liked it. (Hey Mikey! He likes it! um hmm, yes, I'm old) ... I was also told when I bought my Samsung tablet that I would be able to use it along with my phone so I could send text messages and make phone calls through my tablet. That turned out not to be true but eh, I didn't mind. Not for a while anyway.

Now I do believe the iPhone has some pretty large disadvantages to a Samsung Android Phone but then they may not be important to you like they are to me. For instance, you can't customize your iPhone ring tone. That I don't like.  Also, you can't expand the memory which means if you have a boat load of photos on your iPhone and your storage is out you have two choices. Remove the photos from the phone or pay Apple a fee every month to keep them in a cloud. I also do not like that Apple seems to nickel and dime you for anything you want to add to your phone if you are able to.

Whereas with Samsung or Android operating system  you can pretty much customize everything, memory is pretty good and can be expanded as well.

I decided a month ago to go back to a Samsung S20 Android because I was very frustrated with all of the above and I wanted it to work with my tablet. The problem is, there is one huge issue I have with every single android phone I've ever had which, I had forgotten about. They will not hold a call in my home! I am constantly dropping calls within 2 minutes.

So while I do have some issues with iPhone as I stated above there are also a few things I really, really liked about it. Firstly, the operating system is extremely user friendly and the biggest issue, I never, ever dropped a call with my iPhone in my home. I could use it all day long and never lose a call. So I don't know what the problem is with Android but I have decided I am switching back to the iPhone XR. I don't care that it won't work with my Samsung tablet, I realize I don't really use that feature on my tablet as much as I thought I would.

I will put up with the annoyances that come with having an iPhone but be very happy knowing I will always be able to connect a call when I want to.

So tell me, are you an Apple or Android lover?

I'm Frustrated

 

Hello friends and family ! 

Let me tell you why I'm frustrated.. Maybe some of you bloggers can understand...

Life!.. Life frustrates me.. (laughs)...All kidding aside, I am frustrated with my blog. Why? Because I miss it. I miss writing. I have been trying to space my posts out to maybe three a week so that I don't inundate you with a post every day but it's not working out very well . It isn't working for me because I get so busy with my life and work around my home, my husband, extended family, my dogs, friends, doctor appointments, errands that need to be run etc. etc. that by the time I can sit down and write a post for that day I am exhausted.

You know, I've had my blog for many years and the reason I keep it is because I love to write. I always have. And I know, people will say, "you have to make the time"... and they are correct except I would need 28 hours a day instead of 24 and I don't think that's going to happen any time soon.

So my plan moving forward is, when I get into a real good creative mood I'm going to just write posts and keep writing and use the scheduler to post. So from here on out you may be seeing a post from me every day..

For you fellow bloggers out there, how do you find the time to blog? When do you blog? Do you use the scheduler? How does this all work out for you?

I would really appreciate any advice you have to offer..

I'm Tired

 

Helloooooo friends and family... Good gosh I'm tired!!! So much to tell you so, let's catch up!

This time last year I was in my bed wondering if I was dying with what we now know is Covid-19. Because of this, all I am going through right now, I am glad I am still here and not having a rerun of last year at this time.. 

If you're squeamish or a male and don't like to discuss female issue's then I would tell you to skip over this next part...

My body is making me nuts. I had some blood work drawn recently and it shows that I am mid way through peri-menopause which in actuality really means, nothing. However, my hot flashes over the last month have become just horrendous. Towards the end of November into the beginning of December I hadn't had a full night sleep in a month. The hot flashes were round the clock and extremely more intense than they had ever been up to this point. Then, they stopped. For two weeks. Yes, only two weeks. And now they are back again. So far they aren't lasting as long in duration but they are pretty intense so I am not sleeping again. I am incredibly grateful for the cold weather we've been having here in South Carolina because during the day I just open my door and walk outside and it cuts the heat right off.

As for my appearance lately, It looks like I just crawled out from under a rock most days. That's because I haven't been wearing any makeup. It's a waste of time , energy and good makeup at this point only to sweat it off....

Hubby is pretty much fully recovered from his bronchitis that turned into pneumonia. He goes back to the doctor next week for his last lung check to make sure it's completely gone. 

I've been on a de-cluttering kick. The shed got me started. I began in the house in one of the bedrooms in the closet only. So far I've made two trips to the county dump and have a third one in works. Good grief! A person or persons can accumulate so much stuff in seventeen years it's complete insanity.

Yesterday and today I've worked on one of the pantries in my kitchen one, two kitchen cabinets, five drawers and I finally, finally have achieved having my counter tops empty with the exception of the coffee pot. I can not get over how many of these small counter top appliances we have bought over the years. What a waste of money. I am going to try and sell some of them. As of tonight my legs and back are killing me but I'd rather have them hurting because of doing something than not.

We had planned to have Christmas Dinner with Bill and Linda as we usually do but a few days before hand I decided it might not be a good idea for a few reasons. Covid is spiking again or so we are being told. Knowing that I and my husband have already had it doesn't give me that much security because while there doesn't seem to be any kind of reinfection in people, the jury is still out on if this can happen. So my thinking was this. 

If it's possible to get it a second time, or carry it a second time that means I or hubby could infect Linda and or Bill. As most of you know, Linda has been fighting lung cancer for close to two years now and while she's doing well it's just not worth the risk. Bill and Linda are both in their late seventies and Bill has breathing issues and again, it's just not worth the risk. I understand that the case of asymptomatic carriers has been tossed out of the courts but there's just still too many unknows and if somehow I was able to bring it into their home I would never forgive myself. So it was best to nix dinner for now. Hubby and I spent it at home together, I made lasagna with meatballs and Italian Sausage that I cooked all day in sauce.

And lastly, certainly not least the one area that is causing me the most stress ontop of the million other things on my mind is my family back in Jersey. Sadly, most sadly, the family is in a shambles. There is some who aren't speaking, others who are fighting and I mean seriously fighting, there is talk of divorces and law suits. It's a horrible mess and it's taring me apart but there is nothing I can do to fix it so I am trying my best to give it to Jesus. He is the only one who can make things better in this case but at the same time it's hurts me because no matter who is right or wrong, no matter who is crazy or isn't, they are mine and I love them.

My nephews girlfriend, whom I consider to be my niece because they have been together since high school ( in their 30's now and will be getting married), her mom was in the hospital with Covid on a vent for three weeks. She passed away on Christmas Eve.

There are two people who I have been watching on YouTube for a long, long time and have come to know through their videos and other social media interactions, one is at home fighting Covid and it's pretty tough on her and the other one sadly, has been in the hospital on a vent for a week now. It's looking positive but being on a vent is never a good thing no matter what illness your dealing with. 

So that's it folks... I'm sorry I haven't been blogging or reading blogs lately I've just had so much going on I haven't had the time or the energy but if you do happen to read this, would you please kindly remember these people who are suffering with Covid in your prayers? As well as my niece in law who lost her mom on Christmas Day?

Speak with you soon. 

This Amazes me !

 

Hello friends and family,

Just a little commentary today.. I am amazed. Simply Amazed!!

No matter what you think of this new 'covid-19 vaccine" I have to say it's amazing to me that it seems, all the "anti-vaxxers" have gone missing! You know, the moms and dads who scream, 'I'm not putting that poison in my child so your child can be safe!", It's my child and my choice"... Where have they all fled too? Because NOW,  all I am seeing is, "oh a Covid-19 vaccine? Sign me up!", or "When do we get one?", or "I'll be first in line!"..

You know what else amazes me and it's kind of scary when you really stop to think about it well, for anyone with half a brain that is......It's that there are MANY, MANY, people who are ready, willing and able to RUN and have a not one but TWO shot of poison pumped into their bodies that A, we have NO idea what the long term affects will be. B, This 'vaccine' is backed by people such as Bill and Melinda Gates, The Clintons, etc, etc. ALL of whom are population control globalists. Bill and Melinda Gates and possibly the Clintons and others although I am not sure about the Clintons and others but I am one hundred percent sure of the fact that the Gates are wanted for crimes against humanity in both India and Africa because of a 'vaccine' that Bill, his wife and their foundation 'came up with' years ago and got these two governments to agree to give it to their people (think used them as lab rats) and it ended up killing hundreds and disabling and disfiguring hundreds of thousands of people. Don't believe me? Go Google it...Moving on. So sad to see pregnant women getting shot in the arm with this junk. They have no concern for their unborn children.... (shakes head)

Lets see, oh yes, C!... It amazes me that people who "claim' to be pro-life are lining up for a vaccine that has used aborted fetal cells from a murdered baby back in the 1970's to make it. It was a long time ago you say? Time does not matter. If I were to say to you, "they used cells from Jews who were murdered during the Holocaust to make it, but eh, don't worry about it, it was a long time ago, would you still be okay with it?

And last but certainly not least, D!. The very SAME people who for the last four years have done nothing but say our government is corrupt, they can't trust 'orange man bad' are all the SAME people now lining up to have a poison vaccine pumped into their veins which hasn't even passed through proper vaccine trial testing like all vaccines do... Suddenly NOW? the same government they hated is now trustworthy with their lives?.. I guess that makes sense to..umm... who?

As for me and my house, we will not be getting the vaccine and if it comes to it that the federal government or any government for that matter tries to force it on people then I will either end up in prison or dead but there will be no way I will be taking that poison.

Fatigue Pain And A Sense Of Accomplishment.

 

Hello friends and family! 

It's Sunday night December the 13th and nine thirty pm when I am writing this but you'll most likely read it on Monday December 14th. As I write this my eyes are cloudy and my brains kind of feel like play-doh because it's been a super busy four days and I am barely conscious as this point so if some of this doesn't make sense, forgive me. I could have waited to write this post but with Christmas coming I don't know when I will be able to sit down and blog so I am writing some post tonight for this week.

As I write tonight I am in pain in every inch of my body, exhausted to the point it's hard to keep my eyes open and this is all the end result of what we have done over the last four days. 

It was my husbands birthday on December the 10th. He turned sixty three this year. We had our friends Bill and Linda come over to join us for some coffee and birthday cake. It was a nice day and evening.

The cake was delicious I was told and while I couldn't eat any of it I did have a couple tastes of the whip cream which was lovely!....

On Friday my husband decided it was time to clean out our old shed that is been standing and half falling down since we moved into our home a little over seventeen years ago. It was one of those projects that through the years you look at it and because there's just.....so ....much... you become overwhelmed and shut the door. Well hubby decided we weren't shutting the door anymore. We began Friday afternoon. Tons of plastic tubs and old boxes from when we moved here (yes they still had stuff in them) old tools, yard tools, fishing equipment, roller blades!, old outdoor Christmas decorations, old baby blankets, family items that had been passed down all out on the back lawn. And so began the tedious work of going through it all.

By the time all was said and done Saturday morning, most of it was loaded on our friends trailer for the dump as a lot of it was just old, broken or ruined from sitting so long or had gotten wet from leaks in the shed roof. Saturday morning at ten am we hooked up the trailer and headed to the dump to start unloading.

Early that evening I went through a few of the plastic tubs and I found the small amount of items my mom had accumulated during her life. Let me show you some.

In this photo is a set of copper pots and the rest is A LOT of items from an old silver plated serving set my mom bought in either the 1960's or 1970's. Everything was terribly, terribly tarnished. I had a decision to make. Keep it and try and save it all or, think realistically about it and get rid of it all. I chose to think realistically, sort of. The silver serving pieces I tried to clean with tarnish remover to no avail and then I thought to myself, what are you nuts? Firstly, I can't get it clean. There is so much tarnish the only thing that's going to clean it off is going to be acid. Secondly, these are not items that your mom really treasured so much. Oh sure she used them when my brother and myself were little children because our family was big back then but once the late eighties hit this stuff rarely came out. Thirdly, I will NEVER use these pieces. I don't entertain and lastly, why would I kill myself to clean these things only to put them in a cabinet so they can take up space so I can pull them out in 5 years, clean them again and then put them back in a closet again? Nope, wasn't doing it. So yes, this all went to the dump with me. 

All except the copper pots. That's a whole other story for another post. 

I did however keep the things I knew meant something to my mom for whatever reason. She did not have much in life but she did have a few things she treasured...

Like this tea set.

Sure, it's got broken pieces that mom glued back together at some point because she would let her little granddaughter play with it but it's still pretty I think and I know she loved this little set so now it sits out on my bakers rack. All clean and pretty for everyone to see. 

And then there are these. 

These blue dishes from London that she just loved and always had displayed on her dry sink for as long as I can remember. Now, they are all cleaned and sparkling again , still sitting on her dry sink that now sits in my house. The little Christmas decorations are also my moms and I remember her putting them out every year.  As I said, my mom did not have much in this life, nothing extravagant or expensive but what she had she treasured and now I do too because she did first.

I am SO happy to report that the seventeen year eye sore of what was once a shed is now empty and just has to be taken away. My husband and I are both in a lot of body pain and exhausted but we also have a sense of accomplishment which makes it all worth it. 

Hello And Life Updates!

 

Hello my dear ones!

My goodness has time flown since my last post. Life has been busy, busy, busy. So let me catch you all up....

It's finally gotten cold here in my part of South Carolina. Well, what we consider cold. Todays high was forty six degrees and I am loving the colder weather. Tonight we will be having our first fire in the fireplace. I really do live in the wrong part of the country. I belong in Colorado or somewhere out west where it's cold most of the year. 

Like most we are transitioning from one season to the next. Out with Fall (which I wish lasted longer here) onto Christmas.

There's been lots of cooking going on and cleaning of dishes, pots and pans.

 There's been decorating and gift wrapping.

I wasn't going to put up a Christmas tree this year. I had to go out and buy a new one last year because the one we had was over fifteen years old and it was just really sad looking. I don't know what I was thinking last year but I bought a six foot, flocked tree and it was beautiful but it was also HUGE in my living room and I had to move furniture etc. I really didn't feel like going through all that again this year. Well, I changed my mind the other day. I was at Wal-Mart and they had a cute four foot, pre-lit tree on sale for twenty five dollars so I grabbed it and I am glad I did. It's just me, Lou and the dogs. We don't know need a huge tree anymore. this one fits perfectly, I didn't have to move any furniture except one small table and I think it looks nice. It didn't fit all my ornaments but it did have all the room for the ones that are special too me so, I am pleased.

What are you doing this Christmas season? Are you decorating? Have you begin shopping? I'd love to know..

This post has gotten quite lengthy so I will share with you some life updates in my next post....

Be blessed by God my dear ones..

Life and Health Updates

 

Hello there friends and family...

Happy Friday....As promised I am here with an update as to why I've been absent from blog land.

I think I posted in the recent past that my husband was going through some testing because he was once again having back pain after eleven surgeries and a spinal cord stimulator which was implanted back in 2019... It was and still is a great blessing but, there is now a problem which we have no idea if it is new or was always there just waiting to show it's ugly head. 

The doctor also wanted him to get some vascular testing done on his legs to be sure that the loss of the use of his leg and leg pain wasn't coming from any kind of blood clots in the legs.

As you can already tell there have been lots of doctor appointments and tests. The result is thanks be to God all the vascular testing turned out well. No issue's there. As for his back, we aren't sure. The doctor who put in his stimulator in is a very very good neurosurgeon. He "thinks' what is happening is, the last part of the metal screws and rods which are fifty percent up the spine, just above that is now starting to give way. He 'thinks' the spinal cord up top may be slightly impinged and that is causing the pain in the back and leg and loss of the use of the right leg. He isn't one hundred percent sure. To make matters more difficult, he will not touch my husbands back. He wants him to go back up to Duke University in NC where they did the last two reconstructions. This presents a few problems for us. Namely, finances, hotel stay, transportation, food. We have five dogs that need to be looked after at home. We have a good, good friend who said she would stay with them but we have no idea how long we will be there.

Then there is the cost of getting up there. It's about a four hour ride one way and neither myself nor my husband can drive that long..So my husband has decided to put this off until after the holidays. 

In the midst of this, my own body decided it was going to derail just a bit more than usual. I had a very severe sinus infection that caused three weeks of almost non stop migraines and nothing helped the pain or the sickness. If you've ever had even just one then you know how sick they make you. Functioning is out of the question. While that was going on, my hormones decided they would begin to act up as well. (I'm 50 and going through peri menopause). The hot flashes began again but this time they were much much stronger and lasted much much longer. I haven't had a full night sleep in a month.

Found a new doctor the other day (not sure how it will work out. We will see). He 'seems', to be interested in helping me but I've had other doctors 'seem' that way too and nothing comes of it. For those of you who do not know, I've been chronically ill since I was twenty one years old and without any kind of good medical care for the last seventeen years because I am a complicated, confusing case and in this day and age doctors are all about money and nothing else. They don't want to get their hands dirty, they don't want to get involved and they don't care about you. You're just a number like a herd of cattle. 

So my dears, this is where I have been. No where. Life is messy.

A Thanksgiving Message

 

Hello friends and family...

I know it's been a while that I've been absent from my blog but, in truth, it's been a rough time of it for me. I will be putting up a post on Friday to explain where I've been and why. Please accept my apologies for not visiting your blogs nor posting on mine. I pray you are all well and have a wonderful, blessed, happy and healthy Thanksgiving. Even amongst all we are going through in our personal lives and in our country there are still things to be thankful for.

See you Friday...

Fall Decorating

 

Hello friends and family.

Like many of you one of my favorite times of year is fall. I also love Winter and Spring but fall is my favorite. It's that time of year when the air begins to get that small bite of a chill in it, the leaves start to teach us that change isn't always a bad thing and sooner than we know it we will step outside and smell the wonderful scent of someone's fireplace burning for warmth.  Mind you, here in the South we are still waiting for all these things to happen but it will come. I thought I would share with you today some of my small fall decorations. 

I don't have much because I have a major dislike of clutter but I have a few things. 

That's a flower arrangement I made for my dining room table with flowers I bought at Dollar General. The old watering can I've had for years along with the tray.

And I finally, finally, got myself a Red Truck. I want others but this one will do for now. Its actually a cookie jar. The pumpkins lift off and you put the cookies inside the back of the truck.

These are a couple of cute hand towels I also found at Dollar General to hang in my kitchen. 

And lastly, here is another small flower arrangement I made for our master bathroom from the same flowers I bought at Dollar General. Again, the pitcher is something I've had for years.

I would like to pick up some more fall décor but as it is, the stores already have Christmas out. It's such a shame that the world moves so fast and doesn't slow down enough to appreciate the days as they come. As for my house, we will...

I hope you enjoyed my little fall décor. 

Shrimp and Zucchini Noodles

 

Hello there friends and family. Today I wanted to share something I made for dinner last week. I had posted a photo of it on Facebook and people said it looked delicious. Hubby said it was so I thought I'd share it with you. 

Shrimp and Zucchini Noodles.

1 Pd Shrimp or more depending on your taste, cleaned and deveined.

1 Med size Zucchini

1 C of Mushrooms washed and sliced

1/2 C Cherry Tomatoes washed and sliced in half lengthwise

1 Garlic clove chopped

Fresh Basil

3 or more Tbsp of Olive oil or avocado oil

Salt & Pepper to taste.

Directions : 

Cook Shrimp until they are pink and done, set aside. 

In a large skillet or pot heat oil and add mushrooms. Cook until soft. 

About halfway through cooking add your garlic. Be careful not to burn it. 

While mushrooms are cooking down, wash and spiralize your zucchini. Wrap in paper towel and squeeze out some of the moisture, set aside. 

Wash and slice cherry tomatoes 

When mushrooms are soft add your, shrimp, tomatoes, zucchini and basil stirring frequently to mix and heat through.

Salt & pepper to taste.

Once heated, plate up and serve. 

Enjoy! 

Life Updates

 

Hello there friends and family. It's been a while since I've written so I thought I'd give you all a little life update.

It's been busy that's for sure. That photo up there is from one of the trees in the historical district of my town. They dressed up the trees for Halloween. 

Life has been, well, life. Unfortunately my husband is having back and leg pain again. After twelve spinal surgeries and a stimulator implant which he got in 2019 and has been such a blessing, still is mostly in that he is off almost all pain medication for the first time since 2005 his legs and back are hurting again. 

So testing has begun once again. He went in for what's called a myelogram. That's where they use a large (cringe) needle and inject dye up into the spine. Then they take CT scan pictures of your spine. It's sort of an all day thing because you have to come home and lay flat for the rest of the day or you run the risk of a spinal fluid headache which is more like a migraine. 

Next up was an EMG which is a nerve conduction test. I swear this test is something out of the medieval age. They literally hook wires up to your legs or where ever you're having it done and electric shock you to see how your nerves are working. Extremely uncomfortable and painful test.

Lastly we are awaiting to see his cardiologist to make sure his leg pain and weakness isn't vascular. As you can see, lots going on there. 

I've had some days where I've just not felt well which is probably more from exhaustion than my RA and hormones so I've been down for the count here and there and anything else other than resting and reading was just not on the radar. I was also dealing with a pretty severe migraine headache that lasted for five days. That was fun. (yes that was sarcasm).

I've also been trying to do some batch cooking here and there to make sure there is always something prepared and ready to heat up for dinner for my husband on days where I don't feel so well. 

That's a home made chicken pot pie I made the other day. I've also gone back to Mass finally at a new parish and it's a bit of a drive but I don't mind it. The parish is exactly what my soul has been needing.

Here's another photo of one of the trees downtown. I think they look so cute all dressed up with their pumpkins. 

So friends and family, life has been busy. I'll be back this week with more posts and to visit you all. 

I hope everyone is doing well..

Lots of love, 

He Saved Me - Again

 

Hello friends and family.... I wanted to share some of my life with you today. For most of my life, well, as far back as I can remember I didn't exactly live a 'good life'. I'm not talking about money or tangible things I'm talking about myself. How I was, the things I did. When I think back over my life there were so many, many and I do mean many times that I could have been hurt or worse killed and probably should have been. I had a bad habit of putting myself in some of the worst predicaments.

Growing up I did not have much of a faith background. My father was Catholic, my Mother was Lutheran and neither of them practiced either. My Nana (fathers mother) however was a very faithful woman and wholly dedicated to Jesus and His Mother. I always had 'something' inside of me but in truth never really knew what it was that is, until my dad died when I was nine years old and I went to my first ever Catholic Mass. That's a story for another time.

But even though I knew I felt "something' within me, time marched on and I grew up, mostly in all the wrong ways and any kind of faith etc which I really didn't know anything about got thrown to the side if it was ever really in the picture to begin with.

When I became severely chronically ill at twenty four I dove deep into my faith but it was still so mature and was sown on rocky ground and the weeds would sprout up and choke it more times than not.

By the time I was twenty seven I had been ill for almost six years at that point, been married and divorced and pretty much hit the bottom. It was then I knew the only one who could help me was Jesus. There was no other person on earth who could. I dove back into my faith but this time was different. I made a commitment to change my ways. ALL of my ways and with Gods help and His good grace I did. 

I met and married my husband who is the love of my life and while the rest of our lives are and always have been marred with illness, injury and poverty(according to todays standards in our country) my faith stayed strong. The Lord had sown my seed in good soil and I let Him.

Well as you all know because I've written about it here on my blog several times over the last few months my, faith in my faith, not God but the faith I chose or should I say He chose for me has really been rocked for about two years now.

Well, the Lord came through again. Today as I took a nap he gave me a dream. Just loaded with symbolism that you can't deny or dismiss their meanings. I will write about that next week and no I am not crazy. Scripture is littered with God teaching us in dreams and yes He can still do it today if He so chooses.

Because of this, as of right now I feel like I am back on steady ground again. It may not be what I would like it to be, it may not be what I thought it would be but the ground underneath is steady once again and that is because as He has done throughout my life most of the time when I didn't even know He was doing it, 

He saved me.....again.